We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize