Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
