Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
