and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize