You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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