Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
