You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
We talked him into tasing himself.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize