you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
