Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
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