I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
