David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Randomize
