oh god the rape fog is back!
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
