What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
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