I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
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