So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
