We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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