SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
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