i just identified you from a description of your pipe
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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