I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Randomize
