I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
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