It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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