Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
