I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
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