that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Randomize
