yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Randomize
