ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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