There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize