i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Randomize