My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize
