She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
only if we run a train.
done.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
