no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
Randomize