didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
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