I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Randomize