your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
