She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
