I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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