I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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