Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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