How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
