I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I FOUND THE LEGS
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
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