i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Can you bring me the toilet please
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
