hotel room ftw
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Randomize
