When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
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