your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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