To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
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