She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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