doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
