i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
it's like iHOP with fire
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
