you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize