i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
