This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
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