Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize