Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Randomize
